Clothed with Grace: Feeling the Pressure

Wednesday, December 3, 2014

Feeling the Pressure

I constantly feel pressure to be super mom and I worry when Grant isn't the "perfect" child, which is so silly.....no one is perfect.  However, I still feel the pressure. My son is four and a half and still learning what it means to be a person.  He's kind, loving, and his preschool teachers have commented multiple times on his love of learning.  These are all such great things!

But.  Then there's the things we have to work on. Grant will go in and out of phases where he will say words like "toot" and "butt," often together.  He's only gotten in trouble once for using it at school, but it seems to come into conversation quite often at home. I know he's a boy and to boys this is hilarious, I just don't want him to get in trouble.

Grant has had a few times recently when he's gotten in trouble at nap time at school.  It's two and a half hours long and he isn't always tired.  At home I'm ok with him playing in his room for a bit until he falls asleep; this obviously isn't a choice when there are 20 other children around you. He knows he needs to lay down and be quiet, but that's a long time if you're not tired.  I'm worried it causes problems for the teachers and that they won't like him.

Grant now sits in church with us. Up until he was four he could stay in Sunday school for two hours while we went to small group and church, but once they are four they are expected to sit in church.  I come with my busy bag and a snack he can't eat until after the music is done. Some weeks he's great and other weeks I feel like he's forgotten what a whisper sounds like.  I don't want to be that mom that hands him an iphone to keep him busy, I want him to listen, but some weeks are definitely better than others. 

In the midst of all of this I feel like a failure.  I let the things he's working on get to me. I'm then reminded of this verse in Psalms 22:6 "Start children off on the way they should go, and even when they are old they will not turn from it."  

I know Brian and I are teaching Grant about "time and place," and after a while he'll know when it's acceptable to say "toot," and when it's not.

I know Brian and I are teaching Grant to be a good listener....and practicing being good listeners with with each other too.  I know Grant does a good job of listening at preschool and in general and daycare.  The struggle of listening at nap time will pass.

I know it's important for Grant to sit in church with us and even when he's coloring or putting together a lego guy he hears the words the pastor is saying and asks questions.  He'll get better at being quiet with practice.

It's so easy to get wrapped up in things our kids are struggling with and to forget the things they do well and our intentions too.  Brian and I are doing our best to train Grant into a life of kindness and a love for God and others, and although no day is perfect, I know we're doing our best with Grant.


I know I'm not alone in this pressure. I believe God just wants us to take a deep breath. He gave us our children and trusts that we're doing what's best.  He will also guide us along the way, so our job is to stay in tune with God's word, listen for his voice, get into the word each day, (I recommend She Reads Truth as devotional to get you going) and take care of ourselves.  If we take time to fuel up each day with God's word, our tanks won't feel so empty.  

Today's outfit has to be one of my favorites. I absolutely adore this vest from Target. I can't stop wearing it, and today I decided to pair it with my Ann Taylor sweater from thredUP (get $10 off your first order here) and my favorite necklace from chloe + isabel

Vest: Target same
Sweater: Ann Taylor similar
Necklace: chloe + isabel same
Bracelets: chloe + isabel c/o samesame 
Pants: Target same
Boots: Born similar

Linking up with:

21 comments:

  1. Super cute look on you, really love that fur vest and how you styled it!! Great words of wisdom too for all the moms, thanks for sharing Ginny:)
    Marta
    www.sweatersstripesandsweets.com

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  2. Wow Ginny you look amazing!! I love how this cream color just brightens up your whole face!! So pretty!! I think we all feel that way about our children. I will tell you that when he becomes a teen, you will look back and realize that these things are small. Important, but small. Christian teens are faced with so many challenges today. Sadly, my daughter has had to learn about things that I didn't know about until college!! Just keep praying. You are doing an amazing job and you have God on your side!! Susan

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  3. ceramic tiles India
    hey you are looking awesome, I love to see this color.

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  4. Hurray for outfit twinsies! This is adorable on you! And I know what you mean about wanting to raise the perfect child. Claire throws her food and it's so embarrassing!

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  5. I always feel that if my children aren't dressed a certain way or behave a certain way, it will reflect poorly on me as a Mom and I am trying so hard to keep that part of me in check! Thank you for being honest on how hard that part of being a Mom is.

    And you look fabulous!

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  6. Loved this post, it was so real and honest!
    oXo
    Jenn

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  7. No one is super mom! You're doing your best and no kid is perfect either. Us moms always feel the pressure, it's part of being a mom!

    xo, Yi-chia
    Always Maylee

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  8. 1. Love your outfit. I'm never sure how I feel about those vests but I love the way you wore yours!
    2. Your little boy is so lucky to have a mom like you. I have very strong opinions on the importance of training your children to sit in church (must be from growing up a pastor's kid! =) and you're nailing it. Also, as a teacher, I can tell you for certain that his teachers appreciate your taking responsibility for any issues he's having at school and trying to help work through them. I had a far smaller problem with students needing a little discipline- they're kids, after all- than I did the parents who tried to pretend that their children were perfect. No such thing! You are doing a great job and you're exactly right... these are phases he will come through eventually. I'm sure he's an awesome little boy because he has an awesome mom!

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  9. you look so cute! I have to admit, I love hearing about how much you are doing to teach your son to be an awesome little boy. Some parents are shocked when their kids get to school (I'm a school social worker) and struggle because they expect to be handed an electronic every time their bored.

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  10. hi dear, very nice outfit..i like your fur vest and necklace
    kisses

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  11. We have the same struggles with Henry. He says "private words" and thinks they're funny.... oh boys... and our kiddos get to be in the nursery until age 5. We'll be transitioning him into church in just a month. I'm nervous! Grace. I think that's what we need to give ourselves.

    Love this outfit, too. You style that vest so well!

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  12. Hang in there and don't beat yourself up. He is four and will continue to mature. I am sure you guys are doing a great job of raising him. I think we all put pressure on ourselves as parents. If the worst thing he says is toot and butt...then you have yourself a winner! Ha!! In other news, you look adorable!! Love the fur vest!!

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  13. Aww Ginny, I'm sure you're a great mom, and I bet Grant does think you're super mom! One things for sure is you are a super (fashionable) mom! This outfit is gorgeous! :)

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  14. Love the outfit! That fur vest is amazing!

    God bless,
    XO, Claire
    Http://www.littlemissfashionqueen.blogspot.com

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  15. I don't think any mother can be a failure if she's bringing her children up to hear about Jesus. Love your vest and gorgeous boots.

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  16. I keep hoping that vest will come back in stock at Target!
    You look great :)

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  17. love your vest! mine is almost 4 and he is a bit unruly but a sweet child. I know he does things daily that make me cringe but I don't want to squash his enthusiasm for life by constantly giving him a hard time. Mama stuff is hard.

    Marie @ In Our Happy Place

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  18. Amazing fur vest!!! You look so stylish - love it <3

    xoxo,
    Ann at www.porcelanna.pl

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  19. Perfect fall/winter look!

    xx
    Jen
    http://belledecouture.com

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  20. Love your outfit- it is perfection!! No pun intended. I don't have children and can't imagine the struggles parents of today face. You seem to be doing a great job; remember to be patient with yourself as well. Thanks again for your recommendation of She Reads Truth; I look forward to it daily!

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  21. I'm sure you are a wonderful mother and wife! There is no perfect child, everything is a learning opportunity! PS...great vest!

    -AJ

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