Clothed with Grace: FOMO or Boredom?

Wednesday, January 4, 2017

FOMO or Boredom?

Last week my husband sent me this video about millennials, if you have a few minutes, you should check it out. I'm not a millennial, as I was born in 1979, but Simon Sinek spends part of the time talking about Social Media and technology and he had some pretty interesting and eye-opening things to say.

Evidently dopamine is released when we engage in social media and receive text messages. We "feel good" and get a temporary high-the same as a person who is addicted to drugs, cigarettes, and alcohol. The problem is, it goes away, so to get it back you have to engage n the same behavior over and over again. I'm definitely not crazy about this comparison. Yikes?

It makes me think about my own Social Media habits. Is it FOMO or simply boredom? For myself, I tend to think it's boredom and a habit, akin to biting one's nails. On the surface, it might not be "that bad," but who really wants to show off those nail bitten hands?

Simon also mentioned how if you are with friends or at a meeting and on your phone, you're sending an subconscious message that the people you are with aren't worthy of all your attention. Yikes! I find myself really guilty of scrolling through Facebook and Instagram when I'm with the kids. The thing is, I can't even tell you the last thing I saw on Facebook that was actually important, so why do I keep on scrolling???? I admit I do enjoy Instagram, but I only follow like 70 people, do I really need to scroll though it mindlessly as often as I do???

Studies show that people who spend more time on Facebook tend to be more depressed. We've become so good at "creating" these images of what our lives are like that can have a tendency to only show the good stuff. I can take a picture of the book I'm currently reading along with my coffee cup on our kitchen table. It's all neat and clean, but what you don't see is that that rest of the table is covered with crumbs from Hannah's breakfast and about a million of Grant's Legos. I showed a pretty picture, but not the whole picture and as we scroll though Social Media my assumption is that we all do this to a certain extent. However, if we don't recognize that it can lead of the comparison game and then depression.

So, where to go from here? It's a habit I have to break. I want to work to be fully engaged when I'm with the kids and leave checking social media to a few times a day. I've got to stop "biting my nails," so to speak. The people that really matter in our lives aren't the ones we only see through our screens; they are sitting right beside us. Social media can be great for staying connected with those we love who live far away, but it's not intended to be the time suck or comparison monster it's morphing in to.

Philippians 4:8 says we are to focus on whatever is true, honorable, pure, lovely, and gracious. This is my verse I'm planning to meditate on this year, and these are the things I need to focus on. This is how I should focus my time and energy.

What do you think? Do you have a good handle on this monster, or do you need to make some adjustments. Tell me what you think.


  1. I like social media and use it as a time killer for the most part. I was off a very good part of December and barely engaged in social media at all! My cell phone went by the way side and I have to say I really didn't miss it too much. I am not a millennial either so I don't live and die by my phone so that is probably why it is easier for me to disengage? Who knows? Like you, I am trying to work on less of me and spend more time getting closer to God and working on that instead. My monsters are Netflix and You Tube so there is definitely some work to be done on my part.

    1. I'm with you on Netflix, I don't even watch live tv anymore.

  2. I was just commenting yesterday that I need to step away from Facebook and Instagram more. I get too distracted by them and need to allow myself to enjoy the "better" things in life ! Thanks so sharing. :)

  3. I have found that I just plain don't like Facebook. The only reason I'm on there is to stay connected with my sister out of state. After reading this post, I texted to see if she could jump on IG. I like IG much better. I have very few people I follow and just love to see the family pics. I can better control the feed without ads and its much much better for me. I plug in my phone at home and leave it on the counter. That helps me better engage with my crew. I'm not perfect, but I try to stay aware.

  4. I just read The Joy of Missing Out, by Christina Crook and it's suuuper eye-opening. Highly recommend it (and I'm someone who works with social media/students for a living!) She gives lots of practical tips for how to think of technology and manage it so that it's a tool and not an all-encompassing part of our lives.

    In my personal life, I keep a few social media accounts and then try to be very selective about when/how I use them. It's just like any other vice. I love chocolate, but do I need it at every meal? No. (Okay, maybe I do.) Realistically, I'm on 2-3 times a day for a short spell and that's it. It takes a lot of conscious effort on my part to keep it short, but I'm working on it.

    I noticed that a lot of people cut way back on social media in the weeks leading up to and following our recent election. Hopefully that will continue to be the case. And as parents, I think a lot of us are starting to remember that the people in front of us deserve more. It's a balance and we're all in it together! Love the dialogue that you started here! (And now I'm stepping away to get back to the task at hand! Haha!)

    1. I've heard of this book, I need to check it out! I'm with you on the people in front of us deserving our attention, good points!

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