Clothed with Grace: The Appreciation Room

Wednesday, August 17, 2016

The Appreciation Room

I shared with you all that I had decided to do The Love Dare book again as my devotional. I'm really glad to be doing it, and it's causing me to think a lot, not just about how to not take my husband for granted, but the way I treat others too.

One of the days early on in the book that really stuck out to me was the discussion of two metaphorical rooms in our heart, one is the Appreciation Room and the other is the Depreciation Room.

In the Appreciation Room the walls are covered with all the wonderful things about your spouse. All the great memories, qualities, and things you appreciate are housed here. Early on in your marriage you probably hung out in this room a lot and were adding to the walls daily.

Then, life, kids, and the realization that your spouse (and you) aren't perfect sets in.  That's where the Depreciation Room comes into play. It's walls are covered with all the annoyances, fights, anger, and letdowns of your marriage hang. If you're not careful, this room can become your new hangout and you'll eagerly wait to find fault in your spouse to add to the walls that are now packed to the gills. The appreciation room is forgotten, and this is your new home.

1 Corinthians 13:7 says "Love believes all things, hopes all things." When we get into the mindset in our marriages of focusing on all the bad, that's all we are going to see, and our tone and attitude towards our spouse is going to perpetuate the negativity.

God has put together two broken sinners in a broken, sinning world. Neither within a marriage is perfect, each has flaws, but our mindset about our partner makes all the difference. Our love for our spouse should encourage us to believe the best in them, and hope for the best in them. However, if we spend all our time in the Depreciation Room, that will never happen.

The dare for the day was to write two lists: one with the things that I appreciated about my husband and one for the things that frustrated me about him.

Here's what I found, I could think of a whole lot more positive things than I could negative. However, if my mindset is wrong, I can magnify the few things on the negative list and make them heavily outweigh any and all good. Once I realized this, it really caused me to think. I'm sure by husband could make a pretty hefty list of the things about me we wishes I did differently, but that's not what I want him to do, and I bet you don't either.

Now, no one is perfect, but I am really working to focus on the good, because there is so much, and not let the bad be my focus. I'm want to be cozy in the Appreciation Room and bar the door to the Deprecation Room, visiting there no more.

Today I want to challenge you to write your own list, if you think you're spending too much time focusing on the negative. Then, make the choice to let those things go.

I was planning to wear this outfit during the first week of school, but couldn't wait and wore it last Sunday instead. I just got this cardigan at the Loft outlet. I've needed to replace my old one for quite awhile, so I was excited to get it for less than $25. I can't find it online, but I like this one from the normal Loft. I've been wearing this top a ton and thought it would be fun with my white jeans. I really like how it came together!

Cardigan: Loft Outlet  similar 
Shirt: SheIn c/o  same 
Jeans: Loft same
Shoes: DV similar on sale