Grateful

Hannah got her tubes on Tuesday and has been the happiest girl in the world ever since. I am so grateful to her doctor and all the nurses and thankful that we could move the surgery up a week. Once the surgery was done the doctor said the fluid in her ears was super mucasy and it was probably like she'd been walking around with ear plugs in for months. This was the worst realization. Luckily she hasn't been surprised by loud noises like he said she could be, but I can tell a diffenence for sure. On Tuesday I was giving her a bottle after nap and she heard one light jingle from Grace's collar in the living room and stopped eating to say "dog!" She has also been walking pretty much everywhere and giggling like it's her job. So fun!

Back to the hospital, though. There were kids everywhere and I made the assumption that most were there for tubes like Hannah, and one of the nurses informed me that was not the case. In reality, Hannah's ear issues were a real problem, but it could have been a lot worse. I think sometimes we can   make our problems seem like they are the biggest or most important and forget there are others who have it much worse. Perspective is everything.

I am so looking forward to enjoying the rest of the days I have at home with the kids and am praising God for their health!

Introvert

A weird thing happened during this last year, I somehow morphed into an introvert. It's pretty weird actually. I used to thrive in groups, at parties, and by being with people. Now, it's exhausting.

If I'm being honest, I maybe have been an introvert for awhile, I just didn't realize it.  I like people, don't get me wrong, but I'm finding that I will totally want to lose it if I don't have a minute to myself during the day.

During my plan I sometimes lock my door and turn off the lights, simply so I won't be bothered. The light from the windows is enough for me to see and get things done, but sometimes people are just too much for me.

I also really enjoy the time to myself doing devotions in the morning and cringe when it is interrupted by the kids, my husband, or the dog.

Same thing goes with nap time/rest time. I need to go to a space to be alone. It's during these times I find myself recharging through reading or watching a show.

For a long time I've felt like I need to be "a hero." Put my own needs on the back burner for the good of everyone else, but it turns out I'm not my best self when I'm not taking care of myself. So, when I find myself about ready to lose it, I've been trying to take a step back, and it its miraculous what a trip to Target for toothpaste a Starbucks can do for my soul. ; )

I want to be a good friend, wife and mother and sometimes that means I need to think about me, and that's ok. After this brief time away I can come back recharged and ready to take on anything.

Christmas

I hope you all had a wonderful Christmas with your families! We did. It was busy as can be, but I love seeing everyone and the joy both Hannah and Grant have during this time too.

On Christmas Eve we went to my parents' house, which is our usual tradition. I think my mom felt like we were packed in like sardines, but other than my mom brain trying to keep track of two kids, I had a great time. My husband was there, but not feeling great, so the kid to parent ratio was not in my favor ; )

The Hardest Part

Being a mom is hard. It's not the cleaning, laundry, or always being needed. That part is exhausting at times, trust me. The hardest part is having a sick baby and not being able to do anything about it. Hannah has had more ear infections than you can shake a stick at, and after the last one we scheduled an appointment to get tubes, crossing our fingers that she'd make it until then. Well, she didn't. She got another ear infection, went on meds, a few days passed and no impromevent. She had to get the rocephin shots again, and it tore her little stocmach up, so puking started. It has seriously been an awful few weeks. She's generally in pretty good spirits, but when she's in pain it just kills me to not be able to take the pain away. Luckily, we are able to move her appointment up to next Tuesday and have directions to give her ibuprofen and Benadryl to get her though.

It's in these moments I find myself relying on God the most. I know he can take care of this and I'm thankful a spot for early surgery was available. No matter what we're going through, he is there with us! For now, I'm struggling my girl,  courting down the days until Tuesday, and trusting in God.

Whatever you do for the least of these...

Recently I went through the drive through after work to buy an overpriced coffee. This is something I don't do everyday, but probably once a week or so. It's actually kind of ridiculous how much this cup of coffee can impact my mood for the better. But on this day as I paid I was overcome. 

Hannah's Birthday

Today Hannah is one year old! We celebrated her birthday over the weekend, so I thought I'd share on here today.

First, I will admit that I had some serious mom guilt about not having a huge party for her. We ended up having a nice time though and we enjoyed the time with family. 

I thought Hannah would be crazy about the cake, and she totally wasn't. This face says it all...

Tree-lined Lane

Over Thanksgiving we took pictures as a whole family-something that hasn't happened since my sister and I got married nearly a decade ago. One of the place we stood was on the driveway leading up to my parents' house. It's a pretty long tree-lined lane and really picturesque. After we got the pictures back I could help but think about this lane.

We moved to the acreage before my fifth grade year, previously living in town. It was a big adjustment, to say the least. I was used to living in a neighborhood and having friends I could easily play with at any given time. Now, plans had to be made, a car ride was involved, and it was more isolated.

I remember years of weekends being spent hauling sticks, if you've never lived in a wooded area, you probably can't relate, but this job was never-ending. With multiple acres pretty heavily wooded and past owners who didn't maintain the fallen limbs we hauled limb after limb to the burn pile for years. Literally years.

I spent most of my high school career picturing myself driving down the driveway to bigger and better things, never looking back, and I gave my mom the hardest time.

The funny thing is though, that while I was there I didn't really appreciate all this acreage and my family had provided me.

The years together, without the constant interactions with friends helped me to appreciate spending time as a family-something that is still true today.

All of the hauling of limbs helped me to understand that being a part of a family means pulling your own weight and contributing....even if you don't want to. It helped me realize what "real work" is like too.

I also learned what unconditional love feels like. My mom loved me when I truly didn't deserve it and was there for me no matter what.

Now, I don't live on an acreage or have a tree-lined lane, but I realize one day Grant and Hannah will probably feel the same way I did, and I hope Brian and I will have taught them the same lessons along the way that I was taught: to work hard, appreciate each other, and to love each other, not matter what.

Life Lately

 We've been keeping busy at our house! Here's a look at our last week or so. : )

We got our Christmas cards back and I love them! I'm beginning to wonder if sending cards is a dying trend. We still send them, obviously, but we are not getting nearly as many as we used to.

If I'm Being Honest....

This picture might look nice and peaceful, but it was taken last week at the end of a realllllyyyy long day. For real.

If I'm being honest, the hour or so after we get home from school is not my favorite time of day. In between trying to unload and reload the dishwasher, make dinner, and take care of the kids and the dog I about go insane.

Until it got cold things were much more simple. Grant would play across the street with friends and Gracie would be outside, doing what dogs do. That left Hannah and I and it was so much simpler. I could give her a snack and do my thing pretty well.

Now, it's a different. Hannah really is a tiny tornado, making a mess everywhere she goes and she has a huge fascination with the dog's food and water. She is also really vocal and wants my full attention and I can't give it to her. She's also ready to eat at 5:00 and now we don't eat dinner until 6:00 because of my husband's work schedule. I can't simply feed her early or give her a snack though. Our dog has food issues and doesn't understand boundaries. When it's nice, I stuck her outside, but now she goes behind the baby gate and whines. Super annoying.

Grant obviously isn't playing outside because it's so cold, so he wants me to be his buddy to play with and I obviously can't and get dinner done, so I feel like a ping pong ball- take a minute to work on Grant with his advent activity, move Hannah away from the dog's food, clean up a new mess she's made, listen to the dog whine, try to unload the dishwasher, try to make dinner, Brian calls, Chelsea, calls, and then repeat.

Grant does try to help and he acknowledges how hard I work as a mom, but just the other day he commented on how mad I got around this time of day, obviously I'm not hiding my emotions like I think I am. He wasn't being rude, he was simply making a very actuate but disappointing observation.

After dinner things so much smoother and I think we all have a nice time in the evening, but something has to give during that hour. My attitude has to change and although my husband has told me I can quit making dinner, he's ok with us just "fending for ourselves," I'm not ok with that.

In the midst of my anxiety I haven't been thinking about God, at all. I get so overwhelmed with the tasks I let them consume me. After some thought, yesterday I started listening to Christian radio during this time of day, I think that's a good place to start and as for the dog. I'm pretty sure she'll survive in the basement where I can't hear her whine and can give Hannah a snack freely. Things went much better too, and the only difference was my attitude.

I get to see the kids so little during the day, I want to use that time well to make them feel loved.

Baby Essentials with The Baby Cubby

With both Hannah's birthday and Christmas coming up, I've been on the look out for some unique things to get her, so I was excited when The Baby Cubby contacted me. They gave me a gift card and let me shop for some great things for Hannah!

I loved how unique all the things were! First off I chose this Unicorn stuffed animal. It is so cute and just perfect for snuggling! Grant has given Hannah a few of his old stuffed animals, but this one will be all hers!

I also love these puzzle blocks! I think Grant and Hannah will have fun playing with them together, as well as using them to build.

This crinkle book had me at hello! It is so cute and girly! Hannah really enjoys books and I think she'll really like this one!

I've heard about magnetic blocks, but Grant never had any. I love this set and the case for them. Once again, I think Grant and Hannah will fun with these!

Lastly, I'll admit meal times have been anything but enjoyable at our house. Hannah gets antsy, throws her plate, and thinks she can handle a spoon. It's exhausting! I heard about these mini mats and have been wanting to try them and when I stumbled on these utensils I knew they would be perfect! I'm hoping this helps out with meal times at our house.

Honestly, I could have chosen anything from The Baby Cubby and I would have loved it. Right now you can also get 20% off with code SANTASHELPER20, which is perfect this time of year!

I can't wait for Hannah's birthday and for Christmas, and I know both she and Grant will love these toys!

The Most Wonderful Time of the Year

It will probably come to no surprise, but Christmas is one of my favorite times of the year! I seems extra special now that we celebrate Hannah's birthday so close to it! I love getting the tree decorated!

Life Lately

Here's a look at some of the things going on in my life right now:

We had some more family pictures taken as a group! I love them!

Grant's favorite person is his Aunt Chelsea. This picture makes my heart melt!

We got our first snow, and I'm not very happy about it. I admit it's pretty, but I really do not enjoy the cold, coats, and driving in the nonsense. I guess I should be happy we made it to December before the first one hit!

Return to Him

I was recently reading my daily devotion on She Reads Truth and was reminded of what God requires of those who follow him. "To act justly and to love mercy and to walk humbly with your God." Micah 6:8. The reality is, often times I can look just like this: a hot mess, completely unaware, with a smile on my face.

Family Pictures

Hi everyone! I thought I'd check in with you all. We just got back out family pictures and I love them! They were taken at my parent's house and I definitely took for granted how beautiful it was growing up!

Hannah is almost a year old and is starting to take a few steps. She's so excited about it and we are so proud of her!

Grant is almost half way through first grade now and it's hard for us to believe! He switched teachers for his reading group and has gone up two levels in the last month. We are so proud of him too!

Brian also got a promotion at work, which is super exciting!

I am starting to feel more in a grove at school. The kids have learned so much this year and I'm really enjoying them!

It's basically been a month since I've posted anything and I have totally enjoyed the extra free time and one less thing on my plate to do. However, I do miss this as an outlet for me. I miss the writing and with life being so busy, I rarely get time to myself outside of the house. I didn't realize how much writing posts helped me get a sense of "me time." 

That being said, I am not at all interested in taking outfit pictures at this point, but I might start sharing more life, kids, and faith posts instead. I don't want to commit to a certain number a week, but I really like this space I created, and would like to share when I feel like it. I'm not saying that outfit posts are out all together, but I like not feeling like I have to over think my closet. I'm pretty happy just grabbing clothes in the morning and leaving it at that.

So, here's a look at our pictures, and until next time....